This Weekend

Well, I already told you guys I didn't count calories on Friday.. and then had this brilliant idea so go and ahead and calculate them "just to see"... yes, well, I stopped when I got to 3'000 by lunch... eesh. I'm just going to try to forget about that. MOVING ON!

Saturday I did awesome, even with dinner out. And yesterday was a win until I decided to eat half a pint of Ben & Jerry's while watching the True Blood premiere (AHHH!! LOVE IT!).. but now that ice cream is gone and I don't have to worry about that anymore lol. On to the stats..

Sat. 6/25:

• net calories: 2,072
• breakfast: quaker Oh's with milk
• am/pm snacks: nectarine, Jell-O strawberry cheesecake pudding thing, a normal serving of ice cream
• lunch: deli chicken sandwich w/ chips
• dinner: steak fajitas w/o tortillas, some chips and salsa/queso
• no exercise - BOOOOO
• 1am bedtime - also BOOOOO

Sun. 6/26:

• net calories: 2,625 - ugh, that hurts to look at a little bit...
• breakfast: Wegman's version of cinnamon toast crunch w/ milk
• am/pm snacks: nectarine, bowl of "Fall Harvest" cereal (lots of dried fruit and whole grain), WAY TOO MUCH ICE CREAM
• lunch: same as Saturday
• dinner: a tiny portion of velveeta shells and cheese
• no exercise - I was so lazy yesterday..
• 11pm bedtime

I just can NOT get back on this whole exercise bandwagon. Morning sickness killed my fitness routine and I am having a super hard time motivating because honestly my inner-monologue goes something like this, "I should exercise. But I'm tired. And my feet kind of hurt. And even if I do exercise it's not going to help anything because I'm still fat and I'm just going to get fatter.. so maybe I should just do my lunch walks when it's not too hot and I feel like it and call it a day. *looks in the mirror* My arms are SO FLABBY... gross. SO MUCH FLAB. Super gross. I should do my preggo ab stuff.. but I'm tired. And I'm still gonna be flabby and fat because I can't REALLY workout to the intensity I would like to be anyway.. I'm just going to get fatter. I'll just focus on my calories and leave the exercise for after the baby comes." and so on and so on and so forth... more self-loathing, more excuse, more everything. I really really do just feel like it's hopeless to really focus on any kind of regular exercise right now because I'm going to see NO results... and it's not even the usual, "Oh, I can't really expect to see any results for 4-6 weeks." it's "YOU WILL NEVER SEE RESULTS UNTIL NEXT FEBRUARY WHEN YOU CAN START DOING CARDIO AND LIFTING WEIGHTS AGAIN." and that makes me sooooooo depressed.. and then I get all depressed about having not worked harder BEFORE I got pregnant and then I hate on myself on that for a day or two.. and then I'll have one day where I feel really motivated and I'll go walk for like 2 miles and then it just starts all over again. It's poop. I really worry I'm going to get hit hard with postpartum depression over my body image and it's going to make me totally crazy for like 6 months. 

Three day update!

I was swamped at work all day thursday and then was completely exhausted by the time I got home... I've gotten into a bad habit of staying up way later than I probably should just because my body is no longer FORCING me to go to bed at like 9:30pm every night. I wanted to go to bed early thursday night... but the trash tv sucked me in until about midnight. Last night I went out for a bit for ladies night with some of my friends and actually did manage to get home about 11:30 and go straight to bed. Definitely slept in this morning and I think I'm probably seeing a nap in my future too.

I've done pretty well with my eating the last until yesterday, when I didn't count calories and ate tons of garbage, so here are some stats for you!

Weds. 6/22:

• net calories: 1,566 - this was probably waaaay too few. I had some time management problems and it effected what I had time to eat BIG TIME so I kind of just.. didn't really eat. What I DID eat was healthy stuff though, so that's good!
• breakfast: oatmeal
• am/pm snacks: nectarine, blueberries, a couple mini tootsie rolls, some whole grain crackers, apples w/ peanut butter, yoplait frozen smoothie
• lunch: rotisserie chicken sandwich with some chips, a cookie, and a cup of juice
• dinner: a small salad with homemade balsalmic vinagrette, a bowl of cereal
• 35 minute walk on hilly terrain at a brisk pace - yay! 
• 12am bedtime

Thurs. 6/23:

• net calories: 2,144 - I definitely let the chocolate sitting around the office break my temptation
• breakfast: oatmeal
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, 3 or 4 hershey's dark chocolate nuggets, iced venti chai, fiber one bar
• lunch: 5 Guys little cheeseburger w/ a handful of fries
• dinner: GIANT balsalmic salad w/ a black bean quesadilla (SO GOOD)
• no exercise
• another late bedtime, I can't remember what time though

Well, like I said I didn't really count calories yesterday, but I had CiCi's pizza for lunch with soda and a happy meal for dinner, and then some crab dip at ladies night which was made with cream cheese and served with BUTTERED GARLIC BREAD... that was probably my whole day of calories on it's own lol. Also with all that sodium intake and being out in the heat, my feet and ankles were HELLA swollen when I got home. They seem to have gone back down to normal now.. but that was a little scary to see your toes little miniature compared to the size of your foot body and ankles. Yuck.  Ah, the joys of pregnancy.

Dang Quesadillas

That was the AMAZING vegetarian quesadilla I made myself for dinner last night!!!

So I was craving some mexican pretty hard core last night... I realized I had tortillas, beans and cheese.. so I came up with a vegetarian quesadilla for myself -and here is the recipe for all of you:

Dang Vegetarian Quesadilla

• 1 eight inch whole wheat/whole grain tortilla (I used a brand called Wrap-Itz)
• 1/2 or 1 cup of black beans
• 1 or 2 sliced mini sweet peppers
• 1/4 or less of an onion, sliced
• 1/4 cup of shredded cheese (I used a mexican blend)
• 1 tbsp vegan butter (super high in omega-3s, which is why I use it for a lot of my cooking in place of regular butter)
• 2 tbsp of sour cream
• Dash of cumin
• Dash of cheyenne pepper

Heat black beans in a small pot with a dash of cumin and cheyenne. In a small skillet melt 1/2 tbsp of vegan butter and saute onion/pepper with a dash of cumin and cheyenne - saute about 2 minutes on medium to medium-high heat. Spread the other 1/2 tbsp of vegan butter on one side of the tortilla. Remove cooked onion/pepper to a plate. Place your tortilla buttered side down in your skillet on medium heat. Sprinkle half of your cheese on the tortilla, add your warmed black beans (I used a slatted spoon to avoid making my tortilla soggy), top the beans with your cooked onion/pepper and top all ingredients with the remaining cheese. Fold your tortilla in half and cook evenly on both sides until outside appears "crunchy". Slice with a pizza cutter and serve with sour cream! SUPER YUMMY!!

Nutritional Info (w/o sour cream):
Calories: 372
Fat: 12g
Sodium: 911mg (if you use reduced sodium beans this will prob be cut in half)
Carbs: 47g
Fiber: 11g
Protein: 18g


Pretty darn healthy if you ask me.. just don't do what I did and eat two... lol

Stats for 6/21:

• net calories: 2,113 - I'm totally okay with this because I ate ALL whole foods yesterday with the exception of a serving of kettle chips with lunch and a fiber one granola bar. 
• breakfast: oatmeal 
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, fiber one bar, nectarine, blueberries, raw almonds
• lunch: turkey sandwich w/ kettle chips and some juice
• dinner: small salad w/ homemade balsalmic vinagrette, 2 veggie quesadillas w/ sour cream
• no exercise (boo)
• 10:30pm lights out (thank goodness!)

Tonight I'm going walking with my friend Andrea, I'm pretty excited about that! However I'm NOT excited about having no workout pants that fit... I even went and bought some XXLs from Target yesterday... too tight... uggggghhh.. that made me feel AWESOME. I have to return that stuff this afternoon... along with the bras that have no hope of fitting... so depressing. I'm ready to be done already, thank you! lol

Bonus picture of my baby bump!

17 weeks - almost halfway there!

FML

"Epic Fail" is not even close to what yesterday was for me.. it was like the day that destroyed my life when it comes to eating. I definitely hit a point during the afternoon where I mentally said "fuck it" and just indulged knowing full well it wouldn't help me and wouldn't make me happy. 

Let's just start with stats and I'll elaborate from there...

Mon. 6/20:

• net calories: 2'500
• breakfast: oatmeal, 3 dunkin donuts munchkins
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, nectarine, blueberries, raw almonds, bagel w/ cream cheese, sugar cookie
• lunch: 7-layer burrito and crunchy taco from Taco Bell... I didn't even order the taco, they just ended up giving it to me.. I could have given it to Mike or just not eaten it... it was NOT good. The 7-layer burrito was delicious... and just that would have been okay, but that extra yucky taco was the beginning of me screwing myself.
• dinner: 2 slices of leftover ham pizza.. should have eaten a salad after my lunch splurge, but this was the mental "fuck it" I was talking about.
• 25 minute walk - thank GOD I at least got SOME exercise in
• bedtime.. way later than I wanted it to be. SOMEONE decided they needed to watch tv in the bedroom until 12am.. (NOT ME)

I just look at my food log and think "So much for watching my carb intake.." but the scale this morning says I haven't gained anything. I hope it stays that way, and that the days of being really GOOD about my calorie intake will pay off. As well as my efforts to get some regular exercise in. I also did some ab exercises last night (certified preggo safe ab exercises!) because by the end of the day yesterday my stomach muscles felt so strained it was all I could do to sit up. That's definitely not good. It was really uncomfortable and I don't want to feel that way every day with it just getting worse the bigger my belly gets. 

Speaking of exercise... I really need to get to Target and get some bigger workout pants, and some just regular maternity t-shirts.. none of my workout pants fit anymore. It's no bueno. 

Blog Slacker..

That should be my new official title as a human being! Because I'm a total blog slacker!! Yay!!

I did not count calories at all Saturday or Sunday, and that probably means I epic failed... especially after the 4 slices of pizza I ate last night.. and the movie theatre popcorn.. and the buncha crunch.. and having "dinner" at the baseball game Saturday night... you get the picture.

So let's catch up on Weds-Fri!

Weds. 6/15:

• net calories: 2'072 
• breakfast: Life cereal w/ milk and raw almonds
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, fiber one bar, grande decaf mocha frapp (my calories would have been like 1600 if not for this EVIL BEVERAGE)
• lunch: cottage cheese w/ fresh berries, romaine salad w/ yogurt ceasar dressing
• dinner: homemade bison burgers with baked beans
• 30 minute walk (yay!)
• 11pm lights out

Thurs. 6/16:

• net calories: 2'084 - it was the morning donut and all the sweets at my sister's play during intermission that killed this one. Otherwise I would have been golden.
• breakfast: Life cereal w/ milk... and a chocolate glazed donut -.-
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, trail mix bar, sweets at the play
• lunch: half a chipotle vegetarian burrito bol
• dinner: some cheese fries from Silver Diner - okay, granted, this was not the HEALTHIEST choice, but the calorie intake from this was actually right around 400 calories, which is totally not bad. Plus Silver Diner's entire menu is organic, so that helps. Sort of. 
• 30 minute walk - I got a pedometer for my iphone so now I know exactly how far I'm walking and how many calories I'm burning, yay! 1.5 miles/188 calories - this is netted into my calories listed at the top.
• 12am lights out - eesh!

Fri. 6/17:

• net calories: 2'300 - the lack of exercise and consumption of shirley temples after dinner is what got me this time. Without the sodas I would have stayed at about 1900.
• breakfast: oatmeal - FINALLY SOME HEALTHY BREAKFAST! lol
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, shirley temples
• lunch: baked turkey rueben w/ fries - really delicious, not greasy at all.. without the fries this would have been a perfectly healthy lunch
• dinner: JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE, BITCHES!! delicious steak and shrimp and tons of veggies, plus I took home leftovers so overall not too bad. As I said, it was the 500 calories worth of soda and grenadine that killed me. 
• no exercise
• 1am bedtime - hey, at least I'm finally able to stay up past 9:30 on weekends again!

So, as I said, I didn't count any calories over the weekend... but I'm back on track today. Reading my Dr. Oz baby book makes me feel really guilty about putting junk into my body.. I got all depressed over it last night, but I'm doing the best I can. Tomorrow morning I'm hoping to be able to get out of bed on time so I can hop on the scale and make sure I haven't already gained another 5lbs in the last 2 weeks. This whole warning of "watch the carb intake" has kind of gone out the window.. I live on carbs. It's true. I try to keep those HEALTHY carbs though! like fruits, whole grains, etc... anyways. Kind of scared to see how that's gonna go. However, in the last 2 weeks I have noticed my belly starting to "pop" and I feel like I've shed some back fat.. Attractive. I know. I guess we'll just see tomorrow!

Taking advantage of the weather

The title of this post is something that I've been TRYING to do but have kind of been unsuccessful at thus far. Today is going to be the last nice day before the rain moves in and the heat and humidity return. I did NOT get my walk in yesterday and I'm a little upset with myself for that. Today I'm definitely getting it done because it is supposed to be 75, sunny and NO HUMIDITY!! Perfect day for a walk.

Mike told me this morning that I was looking thinner - I'm hoping that keeping my calories under control and trying to get those daily walks in are paying off. If I didn't have so much extra padding on my tummy I'm pretty sure I'd be actually "showing" by now. Instead I still feel like I just look fat.

Yesterday was a bit of a calorie fail thanks to my poor choice of sandwich at Subway. Normally I go with the turkey breast... and either 6" or footlong is a pretty good choice, the 6" especially.. well, yesterday I gave in to my baby cravings and went with the Spicy Italian. Footlong. Knocking me back about 1'000 for lunch. Not including my little bag of baked lays. The original idea was to save the second half for later... obviously that didn't happen. Had I squeezed my walk in, I could have brought my net calories down to my 2'000 max mark. Another reason I'm pretty disappointed in myself.

Stats for 6/14/11:

• net calories: 2'200 
• breakfast: oatmeal w/ splash of milk
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, 100 calorie bag of Smartfood White Cheddar popcorn, wheat thins
• lunch: footlong spicy italian sub w/ baked lays and unsweetened tea
• dinner: 3oz. of steak w/ red potatoes tossed in olive oil and rosemary, and two small slices of bagette
• no exercise
• 11pm lights out

Weekend Wrap-up

This weekend was kind of a bust on food choices. I stayed under my 2'000 calorie mark - but those were definitely NOT nutrient dense calories. Instead they were filled with pizza, chinese food, movie theatre soft pretzels and soda. And I definitely felt like crap yesterday because of it. And then decided to add some Taco Bell on top of that... definitely not the most brilliant idea ever since Taco Bell has consistently made my stomach freak out since I got pregnant. I even PACKED MY LUNCH yesterday so that I could still go out to lunch with my co-workers, but avoid eating that toxic junk.. but I caved right before we left the office because a bean burrito sounded SO GOOD. It was not. It didn't taste as good as I wanted it to at all. It was actually really close to just being gross. I may have to challenge myself to 30 days of no fast food... and as soon as I typed that I started thinking how delicious Arby's would be. Which probably means I should DEFINITELY challenge myself to 30 days fast-food-free. I'll think on that today.. but I will really need Mike's support in that because he is a total fast food junkie.

I'm not going to do stats for the weekend since I stayed under my calorie mark even though it was a bunch of junk food - but I will say I did lots of walking! I'm going to research some pedometer apps this afternoon for my phone, and maybe splurge the $0.99 for a good one, since I always have my phone in my pocket.

Stats for 6/13/11:

• net calories: 1'727
• breakfast: oatmeal w/ a splash of milk, kiwifruit
• am/pm snacks: fiber one bar, apples w/ peanut butter, cottage cheese w/ fresh blueberries and strawberries
• lunch: soft taco and a bean burrito, 12oz of Mountain Dew (which I probably have no business drinking to begin with)
• dinner: leftover kung pao shrimp w/ brown rice, 2 crab rangoons
• exercise: 30 minute walk after lunch
• 11pm lights out

So, when I got back to the office after lunch/walking.. I had this really bizarre "attack" of sorts. I got incredibly fatigued all of a sudden, so fatigued that even just typing felt like the hardest thing I'd ever had to do... and then I broke out into this cold sweat all over my body, but I felt too hot all at the same time.. and then I started feeling like I was having a panic attack but when I checked my pulse I could hardly feel it, which  made me think my blood pressure was actually DROPPING not rising like it would normally do during a panic attack. The drop in blood pressure would also explain my out-of-nowhere exhaustion. And all of this happened after I had eaten 3 sour patch kids.. which makes me think I somehow eff'd up my blood sugar. I'm a little terrified of gestational diabetes, especially since I'm SO overweight right now. But I had a glucose test run last month and that came up normal as far as I'm aware.. so I'm wondering if maybe this was just some kind of weird mental thing. I DID however manage to totally dehydrate myself Friday night, and THAT was a little scary... we went to a minor league baseball game with some friends and it was SO HOT outside, and I definitely did not drink enough water.. and when we got home I felt like I might puke and die. After drinking two giant glasses of water I felt much better though.

I guess I'm not really used to my body being so incredibly sensitive to things.. I never got this way when I was pregnant with James, but I think a lot of that was because I was SO young and in pretty good shape and your body can take a lot more abuse if it's healthier. All of this is just really inspiring me to work that much harder throughout the rest of my pregnancy and after the baby is born to get fit and stay fit. I'm really hoping any postpartum depression won't completely derail that. I had a little bit after James was born, and there were a couple months were it was pretty extreme and I packed on about 20 pounds. Where I am right now I can't afford that.. not emotionally, not physically, and not financially. 

I've screwed myself

by taking 2 months off from working out... I understand that I've had a pretty legit excuse this whole time, but I am SO OUT AND OF SHAPE right now. I did an hour of prenatal yoga Wednesday night and it kicked my butt. That is really sad because it was about 25% of the intensity of a "normal" yoga workout for me. But the point is: I DID IT. There was definitely a big part of me that just wanted to give up half-way through because I was so mad at myself for huffing and puffing my way through it... that part of me wanted to never do that workout again.. but I sternly reminded myself that if I don't keep it up then I just continue to feel as out of shape as I do now. I just hate that feeling of starting completely over... which ties in to that anger with myself for ever stopping good habits to begin with - I'm talking from back in high school and stuff. I think to myself, "I used to do 100 crunches, 50 squats and 30 wall push-ups every morning before I got dressed. Why did I stop doing that?" Obviously life is a little different now... I honestly don't think there's even room in my current bedroom to lie down and do crunches...plus that was before I worked full time, and before I was married with kids, etc, etc.

Exercise woes aside, I've done a really excellent job with my eating the last few days! Tons of fruits and veggies, very few extra calories. I'm pretty proud of myself.

Stats for 6/8/11:

• net calories: 1'900
• breakfast: oatmeal, apples w/ peanut butter
• am/pm snacks: nectarine, 1 oz. sharp cheddar, fiber one bar, Smartfood white cheddar popcorn, handful of sour patch kids, apple/raspberry juice, strawberries, green grapes
• lunch: turkey sandwich on whole wheat w/ cheddar and mustard and kettle chips at home
• dinner: tortilla soup at mom's
• late night: cereal - I was STARVING before bed
• exercise: 1 hour of yoga
• 11pm lights out

6/9/11:

• net calories: 1'712
• breakfast: oatmeal, kiwi
• am/pm snacks: apples w/ peanut butter, green grapes, granola bar, 1oz. sharp cheddar, tropical juice
• lunch: turkey sandwich on flax & fiber bread w/ cheese and mustard, baked lays, cottage cheese w/ fresh blueberries and strawberries
• dinner: homemade grilled chicken cesar wraps on whole wheat tortillas (SO GOOD)
• exercise: 45 minutes at the pool, 20 of which was spent doing some actual laps
• midnight lights out (a liiiittle tired today, not gonna lie)

I'm thinking about downloading a pedometer app to my iphone to see how much I'm walking just regularly during the day. I've starting making it a point to park across the parking lot at work and toward the back of the lot whenever I go to Target, the grocery store, etc... this way I figure even if I can't get an actual walk-for-exercise walk in, I've gotten a decent amount of actual steps during the day to boost that metabolism. 

Tonight I'm going out to either a baseball game or bowling for a friend's birthday so I will prob end up eating like crap, but it's okay to have some splurges here and there. I'm going to try to get at least a 15 minute walk in before we leave for that, if it's not too hot... the weather has been sweltering here the last couple weeks and that makes this pregnant lady feel like she's gonna die if I get my heart rate up too high while outside in the heat! Gotta be careful of that.. hopefully a couple months of regular exercise and I won't feel that way. 

Headed in the right direction - I think

Sorry it's been quite a while since my last update. I think I'm finally getting back on track... it certainly helped on Monday at my doctor's appointment when I weighed in at 209... that would be 5 lbs more than where I was at my PREVIOUS doctor's appointment only 4 weeks earlier. So far I've gained 8 of the maximum of 15lbs my doctor wants me to gain throughout my entire pregnancy... so I was (politely) warned to start counting calories and to watch my carb intake. YAY FOR BEING FAT!!

So I'm going to start posting my tracking here again, sans the smoking and alcoholic beverages counters.. obv.

My second trimester daily calorie goal is: 2'000 - from what I can figure this should be about right... I should be eating about 200-300 calories a day more than I normally would. Since my previous caloric goals have ranged.. well... kind of all over the place... I'm gonna go with what I would IDEALLY be consuming on a daily basis, which would be right around 1'750.

My daily exercise goal is: 30 mins. - whether that be walking, yoga, general calisthenics, vigorous household chores, etc. I need to be getting 30 mins a day in at the least. This will also help with my weight control. Obviously.

Everything else kind of comes together on its own - such as bedtimes. There are rarely times that I can force myself to stay awake past 11pm these days. That's okay by me.

Yesterday I did very well:

• total calories: 1'778
• breakfast: high fiber cinnamon oatmeal w/ 1/4 cup of milk
• am/pm snacks: pistachios, green grapes, wheat thins, Fiber One granola bar, 1oz. cheddar cheese, Wegmans brand cinnamon toast crunch
• lunch: turkey sandwich on whole wheat with kettle chips, granola bar
• dinner: Asiago cheese tortellini Lean Cuinsine
• no traditional exercise, parked in the back of the lot at Wegmans and power-walked through my hour of grocery shopping. I feel okay about that. 
• 11pm lights out

I will post today's stats later tonight.

Best Abs Ever?

When I'm not preggo anymore... I'm trying this one. Definitely worth a shot.

The Single Best Ab Exercise You Can Do -- And It's Not A Crunch