30 days

I drank too much last night. This is not uncommon. It happens every couple weeks. Sometimes more often, sometimes less often, but the point is that it happens regularly enough that you would think I’d know better by now.

I thought to myself this morning, “Starting today, no more alcohol for 30 days.” Then I immediately came up with all these reasons why I “can’t” stop drinking alcohol for 30 days. Which then immediately made the rational side of me say, “This is exactly why you need to give up alcohol for 30 days.”

I mean, I’ve been saying for months (if not years) how much I’d like to just be a morning person, to get up and go run in the mornings before work, etc. A big reason why I have a hard time in the mornings (aside from just not really being a morning person) is that if I have more than one alcoholic beverage it makes me about 90% more likely to stay up later than I’d like to (if I were sober), which in turn makes it 90% more difficult to get up at my usual time, let alone an hour or two earlier in order to do exercise. I’ve also been known to say things to the effect of, “Well, if I could just give up beer I’d drop a ton of weight, I’m sure!” While that may not be entirely true since I’m sure I’ll just replace beer with soda or something equally as calorically damaging, it certainly couldn’t hurt. And I know for sure, 110%, that's something that will certainly lower my triglycerides... which, btw, I still haven't gotten checked. I'm waiting for my new insurance to start September 1 and then I'll schedule the appointment.

I feel like this isn’t making as much sense as I want it to, but basically it boils down to this:

• I’m not drinking often, but when I do I’m drinking to excess and it’s unnecessary. 
• I’m feeling like my socialization shouldn’t be solely based on and revolve around drinking alcohol. 
• I want to be able to have one or two drinks and enjoy them versus feeling like I have to drink because “it’s what I do” or some other such nonsense.

I’ll be honest, I am totally terrified of this idea and am worried I won’t be able to do it – mainly because I just have that personality that the moment you tell me I can’t do or have something, that’s the only thing I want to do or have. But I’m giving it a shot anyway. It shouldn’t really be that big of a deal seeing as I rarely drink more than once or twice a week anyway – at least, that’s what I’ll keep telling myself.

*takes deep breath* Okay, so, beginning today, August 7^th, 30 days no alcohol. I got this.