Okay, I know it’s only been 3 weeks… but I had been eating at maintenance (or doing a “refeed”) from November to the beginning of March, so I’m feeling like a 15-20% cut from TDEE should be leading to SOME weight loss. SOME.
I lost 3 lbs the first
week back counting calories, and have proceeded to lose nothing in the last 2
weeks even though I’ve stuck to the same types of foods, the same calorie
range, and have increased my activity significantly. I began my first week of
#100DaysOfChange doing mostly yoga and dance games on the Wii. My second week I
jumped back into lifting and running with a couple of active rest days (ie:
yoga).
W. T. F.
While I do not in any
way expect to lose 3lbs a week, I do expect to lose something. Hopefully I’m burning fat. Alllll the fat. And just
holding water in my muscles making the scale stagnant.
I took measurements on
Saturday, and those are mostly the same as they were a couple months ago. Very,
very, slight changes. Like a quarter of an inch or less. I’d post them, except
I forgot to write them all down. I’m so smart. I do know my natural waist was
down to 32”, but my waist-at-navel and hips haven’t changed which is where I
had gained some fat over the winter. I’ll retake this weekend and actually
record them this time!
So that’s frustrating.
Plus I’ve been really hungry over the
last week and have no PMS to blame it on, and this plus the above frustration
is leading me to want to say “fuck it” to calorie counting. Again. But I know I’m
being incredibly impatient and need to get over myself, so I hope this little
vent will get it off my mind and allow me to plug along. Maybe I’ll have
another random 3lbs week this week and it’ll all just balance out!
I struggled a little
bit on Sunday and Monday this week to get the workout in. I stayed out way too
late Saturday night and it set me off on a bit of an emotional tailspin and
threatened to push me back into bad habits. Live and learn. Unless it’s a truly
special occasion, this girl needs to get her butt home and in bed around
midnight. No excuses. I’m feeling much more motivated today and am looking
forward to getting home and getting a good, tough workout in followed by a
long, hot shower, some tv with Mike, some reading before bed, and asleep by
11:30pm. I can’t wait and I love how my priorities are changing to put me in this
headspace.
Now to totally up and change subjects: I said in my last
update that I would post progress pictures soon. These were taken mid-February a
couple weeks into Female Body Breakthrough before I had my breakdown (see what I did there?) and quit
exercising for nearly 2 weeks.
Quite a bit of
difference from my January 12th photos I talked about and posted a couple months ago.
I'm still not
close to where I had been around Fall of 2013, but making steps. I can’t say
enough about how #100DaysOfChange is, well, changing my life and my perspectives
and my goals. I know I just said Sunday and Monday were rough, which they were,
and that’s to be expected every now and again – but overall I am absolutely
loving choosing something to do for myself every day, taking that picture to
prove to myself that it got done, and the love and support I’m getting from my
family and friends. Probably the most exciting thing about it though, is the
fact that I can feel myself slowly pulling through this depression. There are
still bad days/weeks, there are still some moments where I wonder if I’m just
becoming numb to the things that stress me out or make me unhappy (I’ve felt this
way a lot this week which I think may be stemming mostly from my sleep schedule being
disrupted) - but when I get home in the evening and choose the workout I’m
going to do for the night, I feel great about that decision and I feel great
while I’m doing my chosen activity. I’m in my own special place inside my head.
It is my time and my comfort space. I don’t worry about my job or my kids or my
chores. I just think about me and how I’m improving my life and my health. It’s
really great and I just hope that it will continue to be that for me, and right
now I’m going to relish in it and try to ignore the scale.
